Our entire lives are lived as a series of seasons, and as one season gives way to the next, it is healthy to reflect on what we’ve been through. Every November I sense the end of the year approaching, and I begin my mental winding down process. This is my season for strategic withdrawal.
It’s a season of taking account, a mental, emotional, and spiritual stocktake.
Personally, I reflect on a career in the fire and emergency services, part time pastoral ministry, and being available as a part-time Christian counsellor for those who wish to utilise me — I don’t advertise and don’t need the work. I am also involved as a core team member in the Christian men’s ministry, Momentum Australia. Family are the priority beyond what I otherwise need to do.
I want to share with you some tips that are running through my mind at present, but first I want to share with you that it is losing Mum in August together with being saved in the car accident I was involved in earlier this month that impels me even more than ever to live the purpose of my life.
A sense of gratitude has filled me since escaping injury on October 17. And a sense of purpose to make the most of every day fills me since Mum died on August 27.
These are the things I want to leave with you as I invite you on a moment’s reflection:
1. I wonder if you’ve had a “lifetime critical incident” (LCI) this year like I have? Most people only endure a few of these during a whole lifetime, but the power of these incidents that we survive is they challenge our purpose and philosophy for life. Gratitude for life is what we need.
2. In reflecting, there is a danger that we will stop there. Instead of stopping there, reflection needs to be a momentary activity, perhaps a season, but with the full intent of moving on into the next season of action.
3. In reflecting, we give our body, mind, and soul time to recover, time to allow our cortisol levels to stabilise, time to take stock and re-prioritise. If we never slow down, if we never take time to reflect, we risk burning ourselves out.
4. We must ward against trauma, vicarious trauma, and even moral injury that would compromise us mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. But if we are exposed to trauma, vicarious trauma, or moral injury it is good to, as Marcus Aurelius put it, “Get active in our own rescue.”
5. If we are to define resilience as a “better than expected outcome given the adversity faced,” perhaps we can look at the hardships we have faced, appraise these appreciatively, and give ourselves encouragement for how we faced our adversities. Is there an opportunity to take stock of the good feedback received instead of just dismissing it as “anyone would have done that”?
6. In fire and emergency services work, we often talk about “situational awareness” or “meta-awareness,” which is synonymous for engaging all the senses in the presentness of being, especially in the presence of hazards or danger. In this, we’re prepared for, even anticipating what may come. As we reflect, what of our recent past informs the unknown immediate future? How can we enjoy more presentness of being?
7. How stressful has this year been for you thus far? If it’s been more stressful than you’ve liked, more overwhelming, or more chronically taxing, there’s the opportunity to plan for change. Living with chronic stress means abnormally elevated cortisol levels in the brain, and unless there are protective strategies employed, it’s not good for our health longer term. Those protective strategies are sleep, rest, exercise, good diet — at the very least.
8. Finally, now, as the end of the year approaches, we have the opportunity to assess if our lives are on track. What are we grateful for? What changes do we need to put in place to live according to the purpose we feel is on our lives?
Taking a few moments out, spending a bit of time in nature, getting into a state of flow, where we have an essential symbiosis with ourselves. All this is good when done periodically, to take control of our lives, assess how we are going, as input to change.
Feeling like we can influence change in terms of what occurs in our own lives is an important step that only comes from sufficient reflection.
It is good to take those moments, seize them, and be honest about what we think and how we feel.
Any of us, at any time, can make the opportunity to reflect on how to live the life we want or need to live. It’s our life.
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