Photo by Carli Jeen on Unsplash
THERE is one comparison with others we should be making, for our
gratitude, to grow in compassion, to train ourselves to see more like God, for
our own good. And ultimately for others’ good too.
Have you noticed what happens when you compare yourself with
those doing better than you? It has likely made you feel empty and envious. It
has probably challenged your self-confidence and self-concept. It has made you
less grateful for your life and what you have than you ought to feel.
Have you ever tried comparing with others in the opposite
direction? — to compare with those down on their luck compared with you; those
less fortunate; those who were born in and live in less materially rich regions
of the world; those who have suffered disease and loss and addiction in their
families.
When we compare with others we see doing better than us, we end
up disappointed. When we compare ourselves with more favourable seasons of
past, we end up gloomy. But when we compare with others who aren’t doing so
well, we begin to feel two things: grateful for what we have, and we feel
empathy for what they don’t have. We certainly shouldn’t feel superior, for the
fortunes of life are fickle.
Two opportunities present for us as our awareness of our
comparative blessedness increases:
1.
Our gratitude blossoms into joy,
because the more we engage in this way of seeing, the more we see the little
things we have that others don’t. We enjoy these things more, and we even
consider how we might spread the enjoyment we experience to others.
2.
With empathy our character grows in
compassion. We feel genuine sadness for what others don’t have, and we may
begin to pray for them, and even provide for them, which we understand we need
to do in dignifying ways.
Compare not with
those who seem better off, but with those who are worse off.
Compare with those doing better and we feel envious, but compare
with those undergoing hardship and we feel empathy.
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