MINDSETS are endearing to life. As a precursory mindset this one’s a ripper. It can only deflate and derail any dangerously negative self-talk you’ve got going on right now—or any that we’d otherwise be tempted to engage in, ever. Truth is; they think you’re absolutely fantabulous! [Yes, there is such a word.]
“They” is anyone in your midst. They love you. As you re-train your mind, you can now start to picture the ways in which they love you.
Now, before you go off thinking this is a bit of tomfoolery on my part, think again for a moment. The precursory mindset might not be entirely accurate right now, but it affords us some confidence-on-loan—it’s a mortgage from the faith-safe and we never have to repay a cent. It repays us.
We’re thinking ourselves into a way of acting. And it’s as simple as acting ourselves into thinking differently. Both are effective ways of creating new habits. It’s not harmful; indeed, it’s very pleasurable to imagine people really liking us or even loving us. The only thing we need to bear in mind is resisting the point of delusion. That is when our good thoughts morph undesirably. It’s a question of balance; of positive thinking.
The truth is this. As we begin to envisage people trading positively with us we begin to open our minds to the very successes that we have been involved in. We’ve all got these. They mightn’t come immediately to mind but they’re there alright! Perhaps it’s time to dig and forage?—rediscovering your lost, flagging confidence.
Confidence is the name of this game. Confidence breeds belief and that breeds trust—within ourselves and in others as they respond to us—and trust creates respect. And respect is the basis of all seriously effective relationships.
Bear in mind a fabulous truth:
“We cannot change anything unless we accept it. Condemnation does not liberate, it oppresses.”
We cannot allow within ourselves any transformation until we’re at a palpable accord with ourselves to the good; an accord of self-belief.
No one need ever know you do this. It can be our little secret!
© 2010 S. J. Wickham.