January 1, 2004, I received this bright drawing from one of my three daughters. She was 8 at the time. I got many gifts like this at the time from each of my girls.
Nineteen years ago, having lost everything that meant everything to me, I was often in a very dark place; a sort of experience you never think is possible, it’s so painful. I was in that place for several months, and the full crisis lasted a lot longer than that. Yet I knew with no doubt whatsoever that God was there with me every step. He was present in and through my daughters and my parents. Those five individuals kept me alive. Them, and two sponsors (mentors), a guide, a pastor (who until recently was still in Baptist ministry in Mandurah), and a growing list of others as I began to trust people as the Holy Spirit led me.
I could never have imagined when I received this sunrise drawing how life would actually turn out. There were still many dark days ahead for me, the darkest was actually six weeks ahead from that point. I still had days and hours and moments ahead of me (and I still have them now) when I felt like giving up. And I have realised that, for me, this is normal, and in God’s sight, acceptable. Perhaps God’s love shines through all the more when we’re at our rock bottom. And this has been an untold blessing for others I’ve been privileged to minister with.
Don’t ever feel like you’re not good enough if you’re tempted to give up. The most courageous people are the very ones who were tempted to and almost gave up. And for a time, some do give up, but that’s not how the story ended.
Don’t feel you’re a disappointment to God when you never actually learn a key lesson, ever. God is supremely patient. He just loves our effort. Our “success” doesn’t please God as much as our humble approach to failure does. What delights God is what is in our hearts, not the outcome.
Don’t underestimate God’s ability to surprise you
with something like a blessed sunrise drawing.
All through this 2003-2006 season of lament and dark night of the soul, God continually showed up in the most unexpected of ways. And it’s been the same in similar seasons in my life since and in the lives of others I’ve witnessed who have journeyed by faith.
Don’t forget those who were there for you... those who are there for you now. Trust those that God places in your path who only want to help, and who are positioned to help.
Don’t feel you ever have to have your life together. There’s abundantly more glory to God in our brokenness than there ever is in our apparent perfection. And believe me, perfection is a mirage.
Don’t feel you’re a burden on others you need to trust for support. Most people love to be called on from time to time to support those who are struggling, especially people who have been through similar struggles. Don’t be a burden and you won’t be a burden. The key is to find a few who will support you, so you don’t lean on just one or two. But use your discernment so you don’t end up trusting the wrong people.
Don’t forget that God walks faithfully with us no matter where we’re at. As we keep looking to Him, as we cry out without answer or help, He helps. He gets us through till morning.
And don’t forget that if the mire is now,
now will not always be a mire.
“Never once did we ever walk alone,
Never once did You leave us on our own,
You are faithful
God, you are faithful!”
(Never Once, Matt Redman)
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