What seems abhorrent to life, so inexplicable and contrary, is the fact of the problem. Moods, disenfranchisements and castigations: all salient expressions of this problem.
Micro-fear: The very basis of all stresses, inappropriate (destructive) moods and other emotional upsets which is not ordinarily picked up in the sonar of human consciousness or awareness.
All our lack is based in this micro-fear that sits quite beneath the surface and operates insidiously shoving us off our equilibriums. And because we don’t recognise it and we just feel awry, we don’t lose a second in shifting the foci of attribution onto a totally innocent person in our midst; who too has their own micro-fear to deal with.
What we end up with is relational dissonance and fracture.
Sure, forgiveness has a role in mending the sore wounds created, but we shouldn’t have gotten there in the first place—well, that’d be the theory!
One of our enduring challenges in the New Year (and anytime for that matter) will be to harness such a highly piqued sense of awareness in all our little myriad pieces of micro-fear that hold us back. And this is no small task. But, nevertheless, it’s one we must tackle if we’re to realise genuine growth both on the intrapersonal and interpersonal stages.
We might like to think we could get to a place where our micro-fear will be recognised for what it is on a routine basis and such a habit may pervade our being. This is so we are more aptly cognisant of that blissful truth: love is truly all around us, always for the giving and taking. The fact relationships depend on most is love and all its spinoff features.
And how exactly would we become aware of, and therefore feel accustomed to vanquishing, this micro-fear?
It takes the introversion of true reflection—an art of self-discipline—a difficult ‘internal’ thing for us extroverts, but not impossible. It takes a ruthless self-honesty. It takes a hardened desire for growth, relationally.
© 2009 S. J. Wickham.