What it means to BE LONG

One of the greatest needs any human being has is to belong.  Every human needs to belong to prosper.  Each person has this need.  Not just in their home, but in their workplace, and in their third place—for so many this is a church, a sporting club, a university, etc.

But have you ever taken a moment to think about what this word really means?

What does it mean to belong?

I think the key to this two-syllable word is in the two syllables themselves.

BE-LONG

The essence of belonging is in being allowed to BE.  Which is such an innocuous way of saying that when we are allowed to BE, we are essentially at home, which means we are relaxed, and we have permission to be ourselves without airs and graces.

There are so many situations in homes, in workplaces, and in every other place where we may find that we not only don’t have permission to be ourselves, but we are also punished for being anything.  There are so many situations where we should be able to BE, yet we cannot because of abusive dynamics borne out of toxic relationships.

Situations where people don’t feel safe bear no feature of being places where they can belong.  It demonstrates that abusive situations are untenable, because where we cannot belong, we cannot live, we cannot thrive, and we can barely survive.  It’s no exaggeration that it is a threat to our life and to our being, being in such toxic situations.  Abusive situations are intolerable.

So this is the BEing part of what it is to belong.

The second part is obviously related to the second syllable of the word, LONG.

In essence, this is what adds a penetrating nuance to the word belong.  What a person needs is to BE, and to be able to do that LONG.  A person needs to BE, with space, without limit, without condition, wholly, functionally, in every way—in a LONG way.  They need to BE LONG.  When the places in life offer such space for time and growth and grace, there is the real sense that these places are LONG on BEing.

We all know this to be true.  When we feel like we belong, we prosper, as much as we prosper around others, and in prospering together we learn what it is to BE in a LONG way.

What the world needs most is more communities where people can BE in a LONG way.

Especially in situations that are long in coercive and controlling ways, where trauma runs rife, we need places for such people where they can BE in a LONG way to begin the healing process where people need the space that LONG affords so as to learn or relearn how to BE.  Anyone who’s ever borne any trauma will know that, whilst it sounds simple, this can seem and even feel like an impossible task.

My vision of the church is that we are to be this place where people can BE in a LONG way.  But surely any community ought to strive for individuals to be safe and prosperous to this degree.