It’s funny the habits we get into… when meeting a long lost friend for breakfast recently I arrived at his house and we took my car. I did what I normally do, not having a car with central locking, I opened his door for him (like I do for my wife). It wasn’t until we returned to the car from our breakfast—me repeating the opening of the door gesture—that he gently and humorously informed me that it wasn’t necessary that I do that from now on… we laughed aloud!
Friendship. That sort of moment will be a sort of flux the binds us together in a ‘blokey’ sort of way from now on as we get that internal grin happening within us in re-capturing the essence of that moment. How human we are!
And this is a fact. Whilst we are destined for a life alone—as we enter life and leave it—we’re also destined to journey, in and out, with people.
There is a glue that binds us in our successes; it also is relevant to our failures but not in a binding way. The glue is love. It’s the way of life where we live both alone and with friends. We’re marked by love whether we like it or not. As my dear friend would put it, ‘We’re locked in.’ And it’s no cheap blow. It’s a lasting mark on every human being.
Success and love are linked so intrinsically it’s not funny. If we wish for success yet do not love we defeat the process before it has begun. And love is this: self-love and love of others, and for many, love further unto a Higher Power.
The way I see self-love is not the way it sounds. It’s the love that comes from being brutally, yet gracefully honest with ourselves and our (many) genuine shortcomings. No matter who we are, we’re all riddled with flaws. Loving ourselves means being able to accept this, warts and all, and being able to see hope despite it—no short order there!
Love of self needs to come before (genuine) love of others is possible. Loving others is having an innate, authentic, meaningful desire to serve them i.e. humility of presence as we interact.
Love like this equals success. We finally find that we’ve had entirely different perceptions as to the true meaning of success all along. Success starts as a little kernel of love. But then it snowballs, gathering a smooth and unstoppable momentum the longer time goes on.
And the love of a true friend is like this. It reveals a true pliable self-love. Again, it is the mark of true and lasting success. From this platform all other successes come.