When I started a particular role, I
had no idea how God would use it to fashion the character refinement I need
right now, for character refinement is a right now kind of thing.
In one word, patience. It continues
to be an indispensable lesson through which God speaks.
Not that I see myself as principally
impatient. But there are nuances of patience that are sometimes sadly lacking
in me. I’m patient with the people I help, for instance. But I have been very
impatient in the case of some interruptions and disruptions.
Here’s a story. Delivering meals to
a ninety-five-year-old, I had to walk about 200 metres from my delivery van. I
help her get the meals inside and then she asks for a menu. (I hadn’t thought
about bringing one with me!) It’s nearly forty degrees Celsius (over 100
degrees Fahrenheit) and I will need not one more trek, but at least three. As I
walked back to the van I began to complain. My heart was turning red. And
immediately I knew it. What is worse than complaint? The ugliness of soul that
must be borne in that mood. And it was my
fault, which enigmatically made me more frustrated.
Isn’t it maddening, debilitating,
and ultimately futile, when we kick against the goads of life? Yet, we all tend
to rail against God some way or other. In this situation, I was complaining even in the knowledge it was making
matters worse. Then, finally, comes the opportunity
of resolve: PATIENCE, now. Not in five minutes. NOW.
I’ve had to learn the old-fashioned
hard way, over several months, that God has His purpose in interruptions and disruptions,
even if I still don’t like it. And no amount of frustration can reconcile that
purpose. Frustration only leads to the promulgation of confusion, and that is
the path paved with the bricks of becoming overwhelmed. Anger tips into
sadness, which can end in tears, and finally the long way around to peace. And
if anger doesn’t lead to surrender it follows that we may end up violent. Never
good!
Patience is a direct route to peace,
because it surrenders what is outside its control.
Patience is taking one’s
opportunity to hear God speak into a situation of complaint.
Hear God say, “Ease up, you’re
making much more of this than you have a say over.”
Patience is wisdom that borrows insight
from hindsight, making it foresight.
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