The resilient vulnerability loving ‘sensitive’ people exhibit

The sensitive person is quite often criticised for being too soft.  But much of the world hardly recognises that what is within the sensitive person is a special portion of vulnerability that those who are ‘tough’ can only marvel about and envy.

They know all too well who is the strong one.
Not that the ‘tough one’ will readily admit their weakness.

So, it is down to the person who is vulnerable, who is most often attributed and criticised as being sensitive, who adds their strength to situations and loans their strength-of-kindness to others, even as they are called to suffer the indignities of ridicule and malice.

For those who are sensitive to the world, who are more truly vulnerable as truth would have it, bring their strength to all kinds of relational situations.  The world would be a living hell without them.

They tend to overlook the offences done against them.  And they feel tempted to accept many unfair consequences.  They make no excuses for when they get their love wrong.  And they seem to have a wise sense for just how their wrongs have hurt people, even if that sense of discernment isn’t reciprocated.  They go unforgiven, though they’re quick to forgive, and they find they must routinely put the past behind them.  Until, that is, they’ve been offended once too often.

There comes a time in all our lives when we are compelled to reconsider our modus operandi.

Perhaps we have forgiven over and over and over again, and for bearing ourselves vulnerably we’ve won nothing but pain.  It was serving nobody any gain.

We decided that, though we could bear the pain, and though we had much capacity to forgive, it wasn’t serving either party well, us being the doormat.

We came to a new resolve as we re-assessed our lives in the context of the particular relationship and how poorly it was serving the both of us.  As they insisted on treating us with disdain, we came to comprehend that there was no love in us allowing them to behave consequence-free.  That is not love, it’s enablement, the opposite of love, which denies the truth we know.  Certain situations call for the love of accountability.

And yet, we could still not bear to treat them with the same disdain that they treated us with.  We knew that we deserved better treatment from them, so we were prepared to treat them as we could only have wished to be treated.

Indeed, jettisoning the existing basis of the relationship for a new more reasoned model, we decided to be kinder than ever as we put our boundaries into place.

We were hardly ready for the vitriol that came, but that, from the perspective of hindsight, was to be expected. Still, it both hurt us and confirmed to us that our action to protect ourselves was both reasonable and appropriate.

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The resilience of vulnerability is prominent in that we would willingly bear the pain of betrayal and rejection if only the person betraying or rejecting us could begin to see the error of their ways.

Whenever we’re capable of seeing and responding to our own wrongs, we are sensitive persons to live this life with.  We have humility enough to be honest, which is resilience.  Able to take responsibility for our own actions we’re safe individuals to relate with.

It’s a delight to be in relationships with
people who have the capacity to relate.

That is, they have the capacity to reciprocate love.  You love them by being honest about your flaws, and when they’re honest with you about their flaws, they show love that is able to put others first.

Photo by Reign Abarintos on Unsplash