“If you’re going through hell, keep going” is a quote attributed to Winston Churchill, and it is so true to life. And when we combine these two quotes together, the Frost quote with the Churchill quote, we get a salient process for resilience.
The Frost quote highlights that the shortest journey is a straight line between origin and destination; if a grief journey started where it did, and it ends sometime in a notional new normal, the shortest distance between those two points is the distance of daily honesty as we process our loss, with honesty being the crucial mediator of that direct path course.
Some days we will be ahead and some days we will be behind.
Overall, as we traverse the journey by patience, denying very little or none of it, we ultimately reach that point where life begins again in the shortest duration possible — which is usually way longer that we were initially prepared for.
The only best way through is directly through the middle.
The Churchill quote is somewhat different. It highlights the fact that we will often feel like giving up or going the easier route. But we must keep going if we are to avoid staying in the tormenting barrenness of hell, and it can be hellish to continue to tug at the edges of grief without tussling with its core.
But there are also days when all we can do is tug at the edges. Days that undo our resolve, that plunge us further into the grief and despair. Days and seasons like this we need our support, our rest, our gentleness, and not our judgement or anyone else’s for that matter.
The long drawn out affair of recovering from loss is only negotiated via the direct path when we have a vision of faith that will call us all the way through.
Such a faith is a promise held on the heart, not so much a bargaining chip, as a shimmering reminder of the firm hope we hold to. Such a faith as already reached the other side. Faith such as this calls us from the other side to come toward it. Faith as this comes from the heart and cannot be denied.
The difference between whether we make it through grief or not, is usually faith. We must always hold to a purpose beyond the present hardship. Something must call us to it. Or, perhaps the best is, someONE would call us to him, because of the situation: Jesus.
One of the best things we can do when our life has been ripped apart by grief is submit to multiple safe supports:
§ doctors for a mental health care plan,
§ including a plan for improving sleep, diet and exercise,
§ a church or small group for fellowship,
§ mentors who will listen and encourage,
§ friends who will be present.
Photo by Jeremy Vessey on Unsplash
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