The Right Way to Give Up

“How does one become a butterfly? You must want to fly so much that you are willing to give up being a caterpillar.”

– Trina Paulus

THERE is a thing to persist with and a thing to give up; a season for sustaining and a season for surrendering. There is a time.

There is a time for all things to have their time, and then to pass away. And there is also the thing that must die so that we might live. Living is about giving and some giving is about giving up.

The right way to give up fits with the right thing to give up – at the right time. Some things should never be started, but then, that’s life. We all enjoy a little folly. Unfortunately, folly clings as matters of misfortunate habit.

The right way to give up is the product of the right thing and the right time – and that time is now.

We cannot be who we hope to become if we remain as we are – unless these two images are precisely the same. We have to ask, seriously, are they?

We may all aspire for a different version of us to emerge. Being human suggests metamorphosing is part of the process. If we are led to change and we resist changing for whatever reason we may die as unfulfilled caterpillars.

Becoming the Butterfly

Receiving orders for the metamorphosis is one thing. Taking those orders, without delay, and printing them as executes is another thing entirely.

We don’t like change, especially when it means we must endure the perception of loss before we can experience the perception of gain.

No metamorphosis is without its own transition, and these transitions involve the meandering continuum of sorrow at the one end and joy at the other.

But enduring the transition is about enduring the shifting sands of perception – and not all perceptions are to be trusted as wise.

Becoming the butterfly is not rejecting the significance of the caterpillar. The organism is simply acknowledging the journey value of each. One manifestation of being takes us so far.

We must let go of some things in order to be able to grasp others. It is hard to take secure hold of two things simultaneously. It appears we have a grip and then it is loosed from us.

***

We must endure the perception of loss before we can experience the perception of gain. That involves faith in sustaining ourselves in transition. Losing is always part of gaining as gaining has to also be about losing.

© 2013 S. J. Wickham.

Photo © Ralph Clevenger/Corbis